THE ANONYMOUS ONE

By: Darrelyn L. Tutt

Phone rings.
Hear a muffled sound…
Individual crying.
“Who am I speaking to?” I ask.
“Doesn’t matter,” says the woman. 
Voice sounds young.
I’m quiet.
Wait for her to collect herself.
“Had an abortion.
Silence....
Took a life.
Deep sobs; guttural.
Didn’t know what to do; boyfriend thought it was best.
Boyfriend is gone.”
Aloneness, fear, abandonment, isolation;
Unspoken realities that line the corridor of a tormented mind:
and an empty womb.
Wish I could hold her, touch her, see her;
know who's on the other end of the line.
Thankful she called.
~~~
I speak:
“You maybe don’t feel very loved or loveable right now;
but God isn’t like your boyfriend.
He’s still there; still loves you;
knows everything.
And me … not sure how you got my number but I care about you. 
It’s okay to hurt.
You’re going to be okay.
Can you tell me where you’re calling from …
Are you in a safe place?”

More sobs ..
“No, can’t tell you those things; everything about me is anonymous.”
She sounds so young …. too young for this kind of phone call.
For a few minutes I love this anonymous one…
Pray with her:
Lord,
There are no anonymous individuals with You.
Each life has a name and each has a need.
This "one" is hurting.
Extend your truth and grace on this young woman’s life.
Bring individuals around her who will love her, hold her … help her.
Be a refuge to her; open up Your word to her.
Psalm 139; let it breathe on her.
Decisions have been made; hurts are real; healing is needed.
God and great Physician,
Love this one who calls herself anonymous.
In Jesus name. Amen.”
~~~
Uncontrollable sobs ….
Quiet.
“Gotta go now,” she says.
Blows her nose, clears her throat …
“Thank you.
This is what I needed today.
Just a little bit of hope.”
Click.
~~~
Lie on my bed and cry.
Cry for anonymous individuals with no names and monumental needs;
For poor decisions made,
tormenting accusations to deal with,
and
sin’s empty promises.

Cry for two individuals I don't know ...
A young woman ... and a tiny life;
Two anonymous ones.
~~~
Wipe the tears from my eyes;
Strangely comforted.
Use the words of the anonymous one
and pray:
“Oh God … thank You,
For giving me what I need today.
For hope; more than a little.
Amen.”
And I'm thankful .....
 No click.
No disconnect.
No anonymity with God.
Not ever.
~~~
“If I ascend up into heaven, Thou art there:
If I make my bed in hell, behold, Thou art there.
If I take the wings of the morning,
and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea;
Even there shall Thy hand lead me,
and Thy right hand shall hold me.”
Psalm 139:8-10